Discovering the source

from the book "NO EXCUSE! in business"

- So how is business? - I tried to release John’s thoughts.
- Well, business sucks. - he replied shortly, but for me these words were more than enough to understand that his revenue is down.
- What happened?
- The economy sucks and our sales numbers are down. - he started - We are working more and more every day, but we are gaining less and less results.

Suddenly John hang his head and I started to feel his very honest pain. I knew that I should be quiet and give him some space and time before he continues.

- Sometimes I feel that I am the only one who really cares about this. I am the only one who really works in this company.
- But you have a great product and as far as I remember your selling always went well in the last twenty years. - I tried to put John back on to the positive track, but he did not give me any chance for this. He just presented me the first excuse.
- Yes, but this time it is different and it all started a few years ago.

Oh boy, I knew that I will have to listen to the nice old presentation of the economic crisis and its effects, but I was also well prepared to handle this. Not to mention that I was hundred percent sure that at the end of the day John will stand up from our dinner with a multi-million mind solution.

- You know Zsolt, the market has changed.

I frowned but I wanted to listen to his version before I would start any argument.

- Go on, John.
- Everything started with the economic crash a few years ago. People lost huge parts of their wealth and they became very deliberate. They are watching and monitoring the market and business is not the same anymore.
- Indeed John - I tried to acknowledge him to ensure him the feeling that I am on his side.
And then the Internet!
- What Internet? - My eyebrows went very high at this point because the Internet is way more older than the last economic crisis.
- You know, all the cheap products on the Internet. - said John in a very angry tone. I saw that his blood temperature is going up very fast as he continued. - We have the best products and solutions but our clients are still searching for new and newer discounts. We simply can not keep them without pulling down our trousers. And that’s what kills us.

This was the point where I decided to start my argument. Specially because the changes in the market can be very positive as well. I was never afraid from a little challenge and I believe that this was the point when I could motivate a little bit my old friend John.

- So let me understand your problem - I started - You have prospective clients who are interested in your products, right?
- Yes, we are presenting our portfolio in many places.
- So, you have prospective clients who are interested in your products and who need your products, right?
- Right. But we can not bring them into our umbrella because they are always looking for cheaper prices or just giving us those excuses.
- Excuses? What type of excuses? - I asked him back.
- You know, time, budget, etc... - said John in a more quiet way than before. I really felt that his mood has changed from anger into a depressed one. - And frankly, I can understand them. This current economy sucks.

At this point I could not stand not to smile. However John did not share my happiness and he immediately asked me point-blank:

- Why the hell on Earth are you smiling?
- Let’s play a role game and I will tell you.
- I am not in the mood to play.

I started to feel that he deserves some explanation.

- Okay John. Look, you have good products and you have prospective clients. However one of your major problem is that your sympathy does not allow you to close those deals.
- It is not true!
- Then play with me.
- Okay.

What I really wanted to make John understand was that ninety percent of the lost sales come from the excuses not handled.

- Perfect. Let’s say that you are my prospective buyer. - I started.
- Okay.
- And please drop me some of the excuses you hear day by day. I promise you I will not allow you to leave the restaurant without a sales contract.

John finally smiled and I started to see the expression in his face that he will catch me now. He was perfectly sure that he can drop me an excuse that I can not handle. I allowed him in this belief and I started...

- So, let’s say that you listened to my presentation of the my product that I want to sell to you. You had some interesting questions on its technical details, but you do not want to buy it yet. Drop me your excuses why you do not want to buy it.
- Thank you for this presentation, but I do not need this. - smiled John.
- If you would not need the product I offer here then we would not sit here today.
- Yes, but it is expensive.
- Yes, it is expensive. - I replied to John, who started to feel some kind of satisfaction.

I gave him the moment to enjoy this almost winning feeling then I continued.

- Yes, it is expensive because it brings you the requested result. Every thing that brings you result can not be considered expensive. The only thing that you can call expensive are those things that do not bring you any result. I am hundred percent sure that you are a man who is looking for a result oriented solution instead of a cheap one.

John started to be a little bit uncomfortable, but we both knew that it is very early to give it up.

- Okay, but we do not have this amount planned in our budget. - John showed his evil smile to me.
- I understand this. As I see you are looking for a solution to improve your business performance. Since we are talking about price you already understood that our product brings you results.
- Yes, but... - and here I cut immediately into the words of John.
- So yes, the result is a key question for you. We can agree on this. With proper results you can increase your income and revenue so the only question is when would you like to gain more profit?
- Okay, but I need to talk with the headquarter.
- I am pretty sure that the headquarter and your bosses are aiming at the same thing, to gain more profit. - Do you believe they do not want improvement?
- Of course they want it, but I need to see other solutions as well to compare them.
- You are entitled to do it. However you just mentioned that you are looking at the result instead of the price. I am sure that you are looking for the best product for your company and I am very confident that if we sign a contract you will be very satisfied at the end of the day.

John reclined and he pined me his question with a smile on his face.

- You do not let me out from this, right?
- No. Because you have the intent to buy, you have the money to own my product and the only thing missing is your confident that you want to sign the contract with me now.
- So it is all about excuses? - asked John.
- In ninety percent of the cases, yes.
- That’s a lot.
- What is really a lot my fried is the margin you loose by not handling these excuses and letting your prospective clients to go to your competitors. This is why most of the companies are struggling because they are letting the prospective client to make new runs with other competitors.
- It is probably true. - said John.
- And believe it or not if you have targeted well your prospective client then he has money and intent so the only question is wether he buys it directly from you or from your competitors.

I saw on John’s face that he is thinking very hard. I almost heard the cogwheels ticking inside his head. I saw that he really wants to ask something, but I felt that my strong character friend became very shy at this point. Then he composed his thoughts together and I received his big question.

- Do you think this is working in the crisis as well?
- John, come on, we are not in a crisis.
- Yes, but we live it’s after effects.

I was not really sure why, but I decided to give him some explanation regarding my point of views. I decided to show him how he can grow in crisis, how he can close much more prospective clients. But I wanted to clear his mind first, I wanted to release his thoughts and implement positive ones instead of the negative ones.

Luckily I got a breathing space because our waiter finally arrived.

Paperback:  229 pages
Publisher:   Lulu
ISBN:  978-1-300-52746-6
Language:  English

Get one NOW: http://amzn.com/1300527463

Everything begins from stress

from the book "NO EXCUSE! in business"

It was only 18:45. I was early again, but it was perfectly fine for me. I always preferred to arrive a few minutes earlier to collect my thoughts and to get some inspiration from the atmosphere.


My dinner with John who is a very kind partner of mine was set up already two months before. He is the typical entrepreneur type of person who has built up his own company more than twenty years ago. I know him since many years. I used to consult a lot of companies from the small and medium businesses sector and I always enjoyed John’s business. We have a very similar taste for whisky and cigars and I was sure that today would be a great night, when we can enjoy two big fat cuban ambassadors after our dinner.

I barely sat down when John appeared in the main door of the restaurant. He was a very tall man, with a height of almost two meters and he always wore the nicest suits I have ever seen. John always stated that we have to dress up for our businesses. I never liked to wear a tie, however I have to admit he has right. There are a lot of people who believe in casual dress, which is the new trend however based on my own experience, clients still respect you more if you dress up as a professional because you are the mirror of your company. So for John it was a badge of honor to wear his custom tailored suits, which gave him the feeling of the “power of influence” on people.

When he noticed me he welcomed me well in advance.

- Hello Zsolt - he shouted towards me from two tables distance - How are you?

I stood up and replied to him:

- Very well John, very well. I am glad you are here. How are you?
- I am fine, fine.
- Please have a seat. - I invited him to the table.

As we sat down I noticed that he is not in the perfect state. I saw that he is sweating and his veins are swollen in his forehead. He was really glowing from the stress.

- Is everything fine in business? - I asked him.
- Just the usual...
- Usually good?

From the way how he looked at me at this point I immediately knew that I made a big mistake. I opened the pipe for complains.

Few years ago I noticed that in the modern society it is usual to complain. I searched a lot for the reason and the source why we are not satisfied with our life. Finally I realized it. After I discovered the source of complaining my personal and business life started to improve. I got the chance to develop myself. It was really incredible because I realized that complaining is one of the very first thing what we learn as infants.

It is incredible how many business and life-coaching trainings are available, such as courses about improving your efficiency, your business performance, or lectures about how you can be more balanced and happier in your personal life. This is why it was really strange that we can not really read about the source of complaining. Somehow people do not really talk about this. However complaining is all around us and I believe that the key to be happier is to understand every little step of the road, which leads us towards our happiness.

Believe it or not complaining was among the very first things we have learnt as infants. This was a very easy method, which kept us alive.

People usually do things with reasons. Therefore you can also always find a reason why we are where we are in our business and/or our personal aims. Life is a big learning cycle where we all have the possibility to learn and to improve our skills. However as infants we made a huge mistake in our life. We misinterpreted some of the gestures, which started to influence our whole life.

As infants we learnt fast that if we are hungry then the only thing to do is to cry and our mother will run to us and feed us. We easily drew a lesson that crying equals with food. It was a very easy and clear message for us.

However we also learnt that when we are in pain, we can also use crying as a tool and our mother will run again to us, pick us up in her caring and loving arms to rock us to sleep. Now this was a perfectly new thing, which meant that crying equals with care and love.

Our infantile brain put the picture together very fast and the result was simple: crying equals with love, care, food. Therefore crying became our Jolly Joker card. By time we noticed and understood that we are able to reach the unconditional attention of our parents simply by crying. And let’s face it, this worked very well.

However what helped our survival in our very first years was a “virus”, which infected our future. This was a “virus”, which made us addictive and this still proliferates deep in our body.

So we mixed up the attention with love as the purpose of our own survival. But the two thing are definitely not the same. This is the reason why many of us have never experienced real, true and unconditional love. Once I heard in a conference that we are living in an “ego life”. The term ego life seems to be true because many of us love other people around us for what they can do for us, and not for the fact who they really are.

So then why are we complaining?
Because we want attention!

People usually speak about their problems because they want attention. Attention, audition, understanding and absolution that everything will be fine and they did not do anything wrong. However if we agree with the Law of Attraction, namely the name given to the belief that "like attracts like" and that by focusing on positive or negative thoughts, one can bring about positive or negative results, then we can easily state that by complaining we will attract only crap around us. When we are complaining then our brain and our spirit is focusing with full energy on the negative stuff, so let’s put a bet on what life will bring us...

I can clearly state that there is nothing wrong with being afraid. In every situation when something happens differently from our plans we can easily loose our faith and we can go into hesitation. Even if it is hard to acknowledge for us during those times we all have fear in our heart. We are all afraid from sudden changes, the new things and from the unknown. It is a natural human reaction. However it is not natural to focus on the problems instead of their potential solutions. When we were infants we had no other choice in our hands, but now as grownups  the decision is in our hands and it is only ours.

But tonight there was no way back, I gave John the chance to complain and he took it. So I was a good friend and I started to prepare myself for an emotionally intense conversation.

Paperback:  229 pages
Publisher:   Lulu
ISBN:  978-1-300-52746-6
Language:  English

Get one NOW: http://amzn.com/1300527463

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